peripathetic

Extract from my notebook from earlier today (actually yesterday, since this is now the early hours of the morning):

--
Sitting here in Bristol Airport. And it is bizarre, faintly, in the way all these places are. But it is also washed with wistfulness... ...the last time I was here, a few days ago, it was a place where I was to meet Alan and be taken from here, from the world even, by his eyes and his smile... ...and although that has happened, and often, this place is strange. Right here and now. I don't like it.

Later

It's lucky I'm sitting in the bar. It doesn't stab with his invisible presence, my memories of me wandering around looking for him the last time. And later, before my flight, I will be wandering around. Looking for him. And he won't be here.
--

So I guess you could say I've had a completely wonderful, stellar, captivating and very mixed past few days. Let's leave it at that. Thanks, Alan. :o)

But the thing is, I'd like to have more time to 'recover' before having to shoot off again. I'm in Belfast now - but in 5 hours' time I'll be off again. Back, in fact, to the place I just left today: the south of england. A bizarre little detour. Which leaves me less peacetime than I'd like before I enter the fray again, as it were. But my god, I'm looking forward to seeing my brother and sister, Jonathan, Owen, Alex - and Alan. It'll be cool. And, I have a feeling, ever so slightly mixed and blurred. It feels disconcerting, but that's only because the past few days have been the first time I've been out of northern ireland for 6 months. This perpetual motion was how I always was for the past two years though. It's tragic how soon you can be sucked into a life of comfortable and deadening routine.

I'll try and post more as and when I can. See you all later!